The Brown Family Farm has a new edition! Meet little Tiger Lily Brown.
Tiger Lily is pretty much the best birthday present that anyone can ask for! It was Matt’s birthday a few weeks ago and his best friend said that he wanted to get him a wild animal. So here we are with Tiger! She’s a Mokave Jag Cat, which is a rare new breed that’s a hybrid mix of bobcat, snow leopard, Asian leopard and domestic cat. Some Mokave Jag cats weigh as much as 32 lbs and they look like mini bobcats. Some look more like beautiful spotted snow leopards and are a little smaller in size. Tiger is 4.6 lbs now, which is the size of my Mom’s little Yorkie. She’ll probably be two times the size of Bear.
Why another cat you ask? After all Bear has put us through, we’re either bat shit crazy or we are now feline experts. Plus, I don’t think it can get much worse than Bear and his shenanigans so I’m praying that by getting a little girl and by training her properly, she’ll end up being a lot more… polite when it comes to her potty choices. Call me even crazier, but I’m determined to teach her how to potty in the toilet.
We picked Tiger up on Monday at the airport and lo and behold the poor thing had pooped and peed all over herself in the crate. We were scared. Holy crap, another Bear. To make matters worse, there were sounds coming out of that crate that a cute little kitten would never make. She sounded like a mini cougar growling and hissing. Once we got her out of the crate we realized that she was just really pissed to have been in a box on a plane for 9 hours. She’s the absolute sweetest most beautiful creature. She immediately started purring when we petted her and over the last few days we’ve fallen in love with her. She’s scary smart too! She already knows her name and she’s already playing fetch with me and knows how to get her mouse. Tiger has completely won us over with her sweetness, smarts and cuddliness. She loves to snuggle up with us under the covers and loves to take naps on our laps. When she’s awake she’s a nonstop tornado and then she crashes hard. I’m officially a weird dog girl, obsessed horse girl and a crazy cat lady now!
The craziest part about all of this, is that Bear actually likes her. We were so worried because Bear was an alley cat punk when we lived at the beach. He would come home with battle wounds and tufts of black hair where he’s dew claw had been. Poor black cat. One time Bear had a whole in his neck that I could’ve stuck a finger through from another fight. Our neighbors constantly heard cat screams in the night. Maybe Bear senses that a baby tiger has moved in and that she’s going to grow up to be twice his size or maybe he’s smitten with the kitten. I will never know what Bear thinks and that’s ok, as long as he’s not peeing on me.
I’m just so relieved that everyone is getting along and that there’s going to be even bigger cuddle puddles of fur all over our house. If only the horses could come inside and cuddle too. Life is so much better when it’s filled with animals and love.
After spending most of my life training horses, dogs, bunnies and humans, I’m pretty confident that I can communicate with just about any type of mammal. At this point, I feel like I can even train a chicken to do a few tricks and twirls. But cats? That’s a whole different animal.
You know that show My Cat From Hell? Well, Matt and I live with an adorable, white and orange fluffy cat named Bear and he would be a great challenge for the cat man Jackson Galaxy. Check him out. He’s awesome and very sexy in a cat man kind of way. As some of you have read in my blog before, Bear is special. He is sweet and funny and cuddly and oh-so-cute, but he has a dark side that strikes when he’s pissed. One night, my brother had a friend sleeping over at our house on the couch. Bear was pissed because we locked him out of our room and he couldn’t snuggle with us, so he proceeded to poop on my brother’s friend. CJ (name changed to protect the victim) woke up very hung over to discover what he thought was chocolate peanut butter all over his pants. But it wasn’t chocolate peanut butter. Matt and I woke up to, “Dude! Your cat shit on me!”. He’s evil I tell ya! But we still love him.
All of our neighbors only saw his good side. Bear would run up to anyone looking for a good scratch and a little lovin’. He loves just about anyone. But piss him off and he’ll poop or pee on anyone too. One time while I was sleeping in bed while Matt was working beside me at his desk, Bear looks like he’s about to cuddle with me and then looks Matt straight in the eye and proceeds to pee on me. Who the hell knows why! So Matt threw him out the window. I think Bear suffers from an identity crisis. He’s a dog trapped in a cats body. Or maybe he just hates us? Bear looks at us with such spite that he kind of reminds us of Stewie from Family Guy. If looks could kill, we’d all be dead and pooped on.
We’re staying at a friends house right now and my finger nail biting habit has come back in full force. I’m scared to death that our cat from hell is going to strike at any moment. If I’ve learned anything about cat training, it’s to make sure that the whole world revolves around them. They should have perches and play time and cuddles and cat crack. Everything needs to be perfect otherwise terror might ensue. There’s nothing worse than cat pee. Which is why today I went on a shopping spree and bought a Cat Urine Light Detector (I’m scared to death of all of the other creepy stuff I’m going to find with this blue light), several scratching posts, new yummy food, a fancy shit box, and a feathered carrot (don’t ask) that comes with a plastic vial that looks like it’s filled with marijuana (not that I know what that looks like!). Bear went cray-cray for the kitty crack filled carrot and started salivating all over with catnip scratching board. Things got really weird.
Bear even has a temporary new girlfriend named Bella (the boys named her Vagina, but I call her Gina or Bella). Bella doesn’t like him very much, probably because he smells funny.
So what’s the number one thing I’ve learned about cat training? Make sure that you kiss their fuzzy little asses.